Nintendo Football League
'Nintendo Football League By Crazy Packers Fan'' 'The first Mario sports game on the Game Cube is a football game, with more action and excitement than the real National Football League, and more hits and slams than ever before. Plus, you’ll have a chance to nail Mario but good... It’s also the Koopas’ first re-appearance on any game platform since... well, since a long time ago. This game is huge, so get ready for a long, long, long, description. ' ''General Information''' ''' 'Platform: Game Cube ' ''What? You say it hasn’t been released yet? Where are you from, America? Well, if you are, then you’ll just have to wait until it comes out, and wish you lived in Japan.' ' 'Genre: RPG ' ''Not only is the script writer mean, but he’s dumb too. It’s Sports, not RPG.' ' 'ESRB Rating: “AO” for “Adults Only” ' ''Yeah, just another script writer’s error. An “AO” Mario game. Next thing you know the Koopalings will actually make it into a Mario game! No, it’s actually rated “E” for “Everyone”, I hope, at least.' ' 'Price: 6300 yen ' ''What? You don’t have yen either? For you people in America, it’s something like $50, or, for most of you, the ones from Plit, it’s 50 golden coins.' ' 'Review: What, you want me to review the game too? Look, wait for Nintendo to release this game, and I’ll then put the review for this game over in Lemmy’s Reviews. But, until then, you’ll just have to'' imagine... ' 'Manual ' ''You just bought this game, and you open up the instruction manual. If you didn’t get blown up by the bomb I slipped into every instruction manual, then you can read this full-color, high-tech instruction manual for the new Nintendo Football League GameCube game! Oh yeah, by the way, if you don’t know a thing about football, then why the heck did you buy this game? ' 'Controls: Offense/Defense/Special Teams/Other ' ''Analog Control Stick: Move player/run into opponent to tackle them/choose direction of kick or punt/run into opponent to block them/move man in motion before play or snap/toggle between plays, up and down, or left and right (more on this in a moment)' ' 'START: Pause game/pause game/pause game/pause game ' ''A: Pass/change player/choose power on kick or punt/snap ball/choose play, or audible after Z or B (more on this in a moment)/lateral ball to nearest teammate or fumble the ball on purpose (more on this in a moment) ' 'B: Jump/cheap shot (more on this in a moment)/no control for special teams/choose play, or audible after Z (again, more on this in a moment)/coverage audible ' ''X: Stiff-arm/strip ball/no control for special teams/choose play, or audible after Z or B (yet again, more on this in a moment)' ' 'Y: Dive/dive tackle/no control for special teams/choose play, or audible after Z or B (I’m getting sick of telling you, more on this in a moment) ' ''Z: Turbo/turbo/turbo/audible/choose coverage audible after B (more on this in a moment not long from now)' ' 'C-Control Stick: Choose direction of pass (more on this in a few moments)/choose direction of blitz before play (more on this in a ton of moments)/no control for special teams/no control for the other'' category ' 'Control Pad or D-Pad: Juke/no control for defense/no control for special teams/no control for the other category (useless Control Pad or D-Pad!) ' ''Choosing an Audible''' ''' 'I promised you I’d tell you this, so here it is: push Z to call an audible, then push A, B, X, or Y to choose the audible you want to call. Z again cancels the audible. For non-football majors, an audible changes the play at the line of scrimmage (even I didn’t know that until a couple of years ago!). The audible choices can be modified for each team, so make sure you check these before you randomly audible. You do this before a play, not during or after it, for all you morons out there. ' ''Choosing a Play''' ''' 'I promised you I’d tell you this too, so here it is: You’ve got a play selection screen, and to choose a play formation and then a play, use the Analog Control Stick to toggle between play formations and plays, and then choose either the A, B, X, or Y button to choose your play. Green arrows signify a pass; yellow arrows denote a run. By the way, you will have four (4) (Why do they have that (a number after the word itself) in contest sweepstakes rules anyway?) plays to choose from (Why do you need to know that (four plays to choose from) anyway?) on the screen at a time. ' ''Moves''' ''' 'C-Control Stick Passing: There’s some new stick or button or something with C on it. Like the C-Buttons but just one button/stick. You use this to point at a receiver. Do this to choose which receiver to pass to. Whichever direction in which you push the C-stick lets you pass to the receiver in that general direction (that receiver will have an arrow over his or her head) once you press the A Button. ' ''Button Passing: This is the easier form of passing. Choose this in the preferences mode by pressing the START button to get to the Pause menu. The default is C-Control Stick passing, the harder way, but you can save this as the default if you wish. The choice of passing modes can be different for each player. Anyway, the whole point of this is to tell you that with Button passing, you press the Button of the player you want to pass to. The letters A, B, X, Y, and Z will be over players’ heads; just press the button of the player you want to pass to. By the way, even though this is the easier way, get used to C-passing, because certain things can be only unlocked by using C-passing...' ' 'Cheap Shots!: By pressing the B Button, you can take a cheap shot at a player during or after a play. With no penalties, it’s really worth it, as you can actually injure opponents doing this, with only stronger players being able to injure certain weaker opponents. A certain cheap shot can unlock something... ' ''C-Control Stick Blitzing: Use the C-Control Stick to choose the direction you want your team to blitz towards if you chose a blitz play on defense. For example, if it’s a safety blitz, pushing the C-stick to the right will cause the safeties to both blitz towards the right. Pushing left is to the left, down is straight ahead, and up cancels a blitz and causes the players to play normal coverage. ' 'Coverage Audibles: These (Get this!) are audibles of your defensive coverage! You can change the way your defensive backs are covering by pressing the B button before a play, then pressing A, X, Y, or Z to change the way they cover. A is bump-and-run (tight coverage), X is all-out pass interference (no penalties make this the best), Y is safe coverage (3 or 5 yards behind the receiver), and Z is putting the defensive backs back into the original play coverage. ' ''Laterals and Fumbles on Purpose: Hit A when past the line of scrimmage to lateral the ball to the nearest player across from or behind your player. Fumbling on purpose can only happen in the last two minutes of the half, so you can keep the ball alive in a desperate situation with no time left or no time outs left. For example, if your player is surrounded with five seconds to go in the fourth quarter with no time outs left and your team down 17-14, you can purposely fumble either out of bounds to stop the clock (illegal in the National Football League play) or somewhere on the field across from or behind your player to a place where few opponents are at, so you still have that little hope of surviving for a tie or win. Of course, I would never trail in a game, and I would only need to use this if I want to run up the score. But this could be very helpful to you...' ' 'Hey, are the controls done yet? I hope, because I want to move on to the Mario part of this game, or should I say, Koopa part of this game. We move on to the teams and players and rankings (On a, get this for all you who have seen my Reviews, zero to four star ranking!) of the teams and players and their positions, of course, so, come on, let’s move! ' ''Teams''' ''' 'Mario Division:'' Mario Mushrooms Dark Land Lava Koopa Troopas Yoshi Yo-yo’s A+ Apes ' 'Baddies Division:'' Fighting Fire Football Fortress Frozen Flurries Grand Goombas Titanic Giants Hidden Teams!!! ' 'X-Tra Division:'' Thwomp Mashers Piranha Plants Super Sub-conians Desert Land Destroyers Bob-omb Blasters Super-Hidden Team!!! ' 'Green Bay Packers (no division) (All right, all right, so I couldn’t resist putting them in this game, but finding them is a bit hard. All right, really hard. All right, impossible. But I’ll tell you how to find all the hidden teams and unlock them... a little later, of course!) ' ''Mario Mushrooms Number: #1 out of the 10 normal teams, #2 out of the 15 teams including the X-tras, #3 out of all 16 teams including the X-tras and the Green Bay Packers (in their own division), so later on, you’ll see #1/#2/#3 and you’ll understand what I mean, I hope. Home Stadium: Wario Stadium Home Music during games (Get this!): Mario theme music remix Quarterback (QB): Mario ***1/2: Mario is not a moron in this game thanks to the dumb programmers at Nintendo who changed this game to make him smart... and good... and deadly, or lethal. He has great power and accuracy. He has superior mobility. He only lacks strength to get up from injuries easily, so he is very injury-prone. Running Back (RB): Luigi ***: Luigi is very fast and a bit powerful, but not too powerful, so he’s not invincible, but hard to stop, at least. Fullback (FB): Toad *: Pathetic! Fullbacks are supposed to block and be ready to catch screen passes, and Toad can do neither. At least he can run the ball, at times. Wide Receivers (WR): Waluigi and Daisy ****: Waluigi ain’t real, I’m telling you, but those Nintendo freaks made him the second-best receiver in the league! Daisy I can see, as she’s actually third-best, but Waluigi? Oh boy. Tight End (TE): Peach **1/2: Peach is good at receiving, but bad at blocking. Offensive Line (OL): Wario, Wooster, The King, and Two Bodyguard Mushrooms: *1/2: Wario’s the center, the two bodyguards are guards, and The King and Wooster are tackles. They’re mediocre at best. Defense (D): ***: Wario is the defensive end on this team’s defense, and he goes on a rampage at times. The others modify their roles on offense to become defensive-minded players. You’ll also see Sorry-O here, the blue clone of Mario from Mario Tennis and Super Smash Bros. (not a real character), who is a complete loser, worse than Mario, let me tell you. By the way, there’s no fatigue in this game, or the players would all imitate Korey Stringer (one of those Minnesota Morons who died) and pass out! (That script writer is kruel, I tell ya, kruel!) Special Teams (ST): **: Mario’s the kicker, and Luigi’s the punter. Mario is also the kickoff specialist. Mario has okay power and okay accuracy. Luigi has okay power and okay accuracy. They contrast in all ways but two ways (Luigi’s left-footed and left-handed in this game), the two ways that count. OVERALL: (not by average, but by opinion) ***1/2=VERY GOOD!!! ' 'Dark Land Lava'' #2/#3/#4 Home Stadium: Dark Land Home music during games: Creepy Cavern music from Mario Party 3 This is the Koopalings’ team, by the way! QB: Bowser ***: Completely immobile but with a deadly, lethal arm with tons of power and above average accuracy. RB: Lemmy ***1/2: Great speed (on his ball, of course), and all right power, but he can slip off his ball easily and get really hurt, so he’s really injury-prone. FB: Morton Jr. *: Trash-talker, talks too much, no real playing skill, just runs straight ahead, so good blocking, but no real rushing ability. WR: Roy and Wendy O. ****: Unfortunately, Nintendo made Roy have incredible playing skill before the “Tourist of the Week” incidents, in which I would have never put him in this game. But, still, he is the best player in this game (Big surprise, isn’t it?), can play any position he wants (Really!) and can excel there, and has great speed, catching, jumping, power, stiff-arming, and diving abilities! He is not injury-prone at all, and has the best chance of knocking out a player for their entire career, or, at least, the season with his cheap shots. Oh yeah, Wendy? She’s fine, too. TE: Ludwig **1/2: That loser? I mean, that winner? He’s all right, too, with great blocking and okay catching, or, well, maybe, good catching, but, I’d still have to say, okay catching. Just forget about what I say and use him! OL: Larry, Iggy, Susan B., Karma, and Nick Koopa: *: How pathetic! The team is so dumb, they decide to put the little guys (and girls) up front! No wonder Nintendo kicked them out of their games! They stink at blocking! That’s all I can say. D: ***: Good. In a word, that describes them. Susan B., Larry, and Iggy get new roles, and better ones. ST: ***: Good again, with Roy doing all kicking. OVERALL: ***1/2: VERY GOOD!!! ' 'Koopa Troopas'' #3/#5/#6 Home stadium: Troopa Stadium Home music during games: World 1-2 from Super Mario Bros. 3 remix Dumb name, isn’t it? QB: Lakitu ****: The best quarterback in the league, Lakitu has great power, great accuracy, and great mobility. What more could you ask for? RB: Tim Troopa ***: WHAT A LOSER!!! Oh, yeah, he’s pretty good, with great speed, but no power. FB: Travis Troopa **1/2: He has no power too, and little blocking, but his speed is greaaaaaaaaaaaaaattttt! (Whoops, another minor script writer error there, unless that’s supposed to be there...) WR: Tineeko and Tom Troopa ****: All right, he’s the fourth-best in the league, Tineeko. Tineeko is great, I must tell you. He’s from Lakitu’s Defection, that great Fun Fiction or fan fiction, but if he’s a copyrighted name, please let me know, and I’ll change his identity. Tineeko has great speed and catching. Tom Troopa’s just as good, the fifth-best in the league. (That excludes the Green Bay Packers, of course.) TE: Trent Troopa **: He can’t block, but he can sure can run! OL: Five Troopa Losers, no stars: I’m out of names, so they stink. I can make up some dumb stuff like Trevor or Tenchi, but I’m kind of sick of thinking up bogus names. Just skip it. They stink. Period. No blocking ability at all. D: *: Poor. That’s all. ST: ***1/2: Tineeko is great at kicking field goals. Lakitu punts. Lakitu kicks off. That’s pretty much it, except for the fact that this special teams unit has great accuracy and almost alright power- and I repeat- almost alright power. OVERALL: ***: GOOD! ' 'Yoshi Yo-Yo’s'' #10/#15/#16 Home stadium: Yo-Yo’s Stadium home music during games: Yoshi theme music remix Extremely stupid name, ain’t it? QB: Yoshi ***: The only alright player on the team, Survivor Trimming winner Yoshi brings zero power with outstandingly great accuracy and great mobility, but he is very prone to injury. RB: Red Yoshi *1/2: I don’t know many Yoshis’ names, so tell me them and I’ll rename them. Anyway, this guy is fast, but no power at all. Plus, he can’t block. FB: Turquoise Yoshi *1/2: Am I desperate or what? No power, but some speed. All right, a lot of it. But that’s it. No blocking ability at all. WR: Birdo and Yellow Yoshi *1/2: Birdo is fast. Yellow Yoshi is faster. But Birdo can catch better, and Birdo has a little bit of power rushing, and some power running. Not so with Yellow Yoshi, who can be knocked out for his career with one hit. TE: Light Blue Yoshi *: This guy stinks at blocking and at catching, but, man, is he fast! OL: Pink Yoshi, Dark Blue Yoshi, Purple Yoshi, Orange Yoshi, and Boshi: no stars: Who knows if some of these guys even exist, but they do now! These ones stink at blocking, and that’s all I can say. D: ½: Oh boy. Wow. What a defense. You might as well call them no defense. At all. Pathetic! ST: *1/2: Yoshi (the green Survivor Trimming champion) is the kicker, punter, and kickoff specialist. He stinks at power but has almost close to just about average accuracy. That’s right, almost- you know. OVERALL: 1/2: PATHETIC!!! ' 'A+ Apes'' #5/#7/#8 Home stadium: DK Coliseum Home music during games: DK’s stage in Super Smash Brothers. The Donkey Kong team. QB: Who else? Donkey Kong! ***: Slow, but surely the best power guy besides Bowser. He’s got rhythm, he’s got style, he’s got a tie, but he ain’t got mobility, even though he’s got power, and he’s got accuracy. RB: Diddy Kong **1/2: Fast, but little power, although he’s got a little. Just a little. Fast, though. FB: Lanky Kong **: All you losers who bought Donkey Kong 64 (well, I guess that includes me too) remember this guy, except if you’re pathetic at the game (well, there’s me again) and didn’t unlock him (that’s me!) and just quit the game (that’s me too!) because Mario’s in only one place, in the arcade game known as Donkey Kong, and he’s only Jumpman! Oh, yeah, he (being Lanky Kong) can block, he can run (a little tiny bit), and he can, um, he’s got some power, Yeah, that’s it.! (Stupid script writer and his punctuational skills...) WR: Candy Kong and Tiny Kong ***: Both females prove that women can play football. (Actually, they probably play it better than the male apes on this team!) They can run, they can catch, they can throw (although they don’t need to), they can jump, they can stiff-arm, and they can dive! Only thing, or things, they can’t do, is block and use superior power. TE: Chunky Kong ***1/2: Chunky Kong is big and fat and huge and humongous and... he can block, he can catch, he can pass (all right, so he can’t), he’s got power, but he ain’t got much speed, so he can’t run. OL: Cranky Kong, Dixie Kong, Funky Kong, Donkey Kong Jr., and K. Rool: K. Rool’s on this team? How? Why? He wants to win, that’s why! Anyway, ***: Good blocking skills and great power. D: **: This is an average defensive team, with great coverage but poor pressure on the quarterback. ST: **: DK kicks everywhere, with much and great power. Another average category. OVERALL: *** GOOD! ' 'By now, you know what I mean. I’m just putting teams’ ratings, but no team or player descriptions. By the way, these teams beg the question: How do Thwomps/Goombas/Fry Guys hold the football? Good question. My answer is: They just do. No, really, they hold it in their mouth and catch it with their thorns or feet or flames. ' ''Fighting Fire #6/#8/#9 Home stadium: Fire Land Stadium home music during games: Fever music from Dr. Mario 64 OVERALL: **1/2: Above average. ' 'Football Fortress'' #4/#6/#7 Home stadium: Fortress Home music during games: Chill music from Dr. Mario 64 OVERALL: ***: GOOD! ' 'Frozen Flurries'' #8/#12/#13 Home stadium: Lemmy’s Land Stadium home music during games: Chilly Waters music from Mario Party 3 OVERALL: *1/2: Below average. ' 'Grand Goombas'' #9/#13/#14 Home stadium: Grass Land Stadium home music during games: World 1-1 from Super Mario Bros. 3 remix OVERALL: *: POOR! ' 'Titanic Giants'' #7/#10/#11 Home stadium: Giant Land Coliseum Home music during games: Super Mario Bros. 3 water music remix OVERALL: **: Average. ' 'Desert Land Destroyers'' '-/#4/#5' Home stadium: The Great Pyramid of Mushroomkamen Home music during games: Spiny Desert music from Mario Party 3 OVERALL: ***: GOOD! ' 'Thwomp Mashers'' '-/#7/#8' Home stadium: Thwomp Center Home music during games: Eternal Star music from Mario Party 1 OVERALL: **1/2: Above average. ' 'Piranha Plants-/#11/#12'' Home stadium: Piranhas’ Palace Home music during games: Fighting Spirit music from Mario Party 3 OVERALL: *1/2: Below average. ' 'Super Sub-conians'' '-/#1/#2' Home stadium: Dream Stadium Home music during games: Super Mario Advance outside music OVERALL: ***1/2: VERY GOOD!!! ' 'Bob-omb Blasters'' '-/#14/#15' Home stadium: Wario’s Battle Canyon Stadium Home music during games: Wario’s Battle Canyon music from Mario Party 1 OVERALL: ½: PATHETIC!!! ' 'Green Bay Packers'' '-/-/#1' Home stadium: Lambeau Field Home music during games: Green Bay Packers music from ESPN’s NFL Primetime OVERALL: ****: EXCELLENT!!! (**** in every category) (actual players on the Green Bay Packers team roster) ' 'Modes ' ''Finally! The modes of this game! In all modes, you can choose from A.I. modes of Easy, Normal, or Hard, or battle a friend or enemy, or several friends or enemies. The modes are…''' ''' 'Quick Game Mode: Play a quick game between the Mario Mushrooms and Dark Land Lava. ' ''Exhibition Mode: Play a single game between any two teams you want.' ' 'Season Mode: Play an entire season for all teams. ' ''Franchise Mode: Play the entire history of a franchise with multiple seasons (as many as you wish), with roster changes every year and injuries taking their toll on players. Players retire, change teams with trades and free agency, new players come out of the Monster Mixer for the NFL Draft (Nintendo Football League Draft; the National Football League can sue me if they want), with all unlocked teams competing for the Mario Bowl Trophy.' ' 'Monster Mixer Mode: Create-a-player-or-Koopa by using Koopa and Mario body parts (arms and legs and heads and torsos and stomachs) together to make crazy characters, then change the player’s stats around to make them good, poor, or average! Then add the player to a team or to a created custom team. ' ''Create-A-Custom-Team Mode: Create your own team by making uniforms, logo, helmets, team (well, obviously!), name, team colors, music (choose from thousands of Mario tunes!), players (from the Monster Mixer), stats (again, from the Monster Mixer), stadium (choose from 25 custom stadiums), stadium name, and even sign clones of players from other teams to make your own unstoppable team, franchise, and juggernaut!!!' ' 'Mini-Games Mode:'' Conveyor Conversion: Score a two-point conversion (basically, a touchdown from two yards away) on rapidly movin’ and rapidly changin’ conveyor belts! Lateral Lines: Score a touchdown from a kickoff return by lateraling the ball back and forth to teammates, fumbling on purpose (there’s only one second left with your team down 5-0), and outrunning and outfaking your opponents. Field Goal Frenzy: Kick a field goal with random heavy winds circling around quickly and the goal post coming in and out and becoming wider and thinner randomly. A field goal must be attempted from the opponents’ 10-yard line or further away to count. Bowser Bomb Blast: Avoid the Bowser Bombs all over the field to score a touchdown from 70 or more yards away. Lava Pits Losers: Score a touchdown from 70 or more yards away while avoiding randomly placed Lava Pits all over the field, while also avoiding ball-stealing Podoboos, who jump out of the Lava Pits and chase after you when you have the ball. 99-Point Conversion: Challenge a friend or enemy or computer player in a game in which you each get five tries at the end zone with the ball from any point on the field. A touchdown on the play scores as many points as the number of yards away you were when you snapped the ball. The most points wins! ' 'Scrimmage Mode: This mode lets you practice any play you want. You go up against a defense or go it alone. ' ''Options Mode: Choose the level of the A.I. (Artificial Intelligence, not AL.) and the number of minutes in the quarter, as well as whether some certain penalties should be enforced or not and whether there should be injuries or not and how long a potential injury’s limit should be. Also choose C-stick or Button passing.' ' 'Playbook Mode: Choose a team’s playbook, edit it, make your own plays, change the audibles of a team, add or delete plays (same as editing it), and rename plays, or, in the case of new plays, name them! ' ''Green Bay Packers Challenge Mode: To unlock the best team ever, you need to complete certain challenges. All of them are listed here, and also listed here is your status of whether you have completed them or not. I’ll have all of these in a moment.' ' 'Secret Teams ' ''Now, time to tell you how to unlock the hidden teams and the super-hidden team!' ' 'Thwomp Mashers: Winning 495-0 against the computer on hard mode in 99-Point Conversion. ' ''Piranha Plants: Winning the Mario Bowl on hard mode.' ' 'Bob-omb Blasters: Kicking a 70-yard field goal on Field Goal Frenzy on hard mode. ' ''Desert Land Destroyers: First unlock Bowser Bomb Blast Game Time mode and Lava Pits Losers Game Time mode by scoring a 99-yard touchdown in each mode. Then turn on both modes so that during an exhibition game, you will have Bowser Bombs AND Lava Pits on the field. Score 70 points against the computer on hard mode with both modes on and win the game and you will unlock the Desert Land Destroyers.' ' 'Super Sub-conians: Injuring Mario out for his career with Roy Koopa in a franchise mode game against the computer on hard mode. ' ''Green Bay Packers. Accomplish the following in season mode on hard mode: Kick 20-, 30-, 40-, 50-, 60-, and 70-yard field goals. Break 10-, 20-, 30-, 40-, 50-, 60-, 70-, 80-, and 90-yard runs. Complete 10-, 20-, 30-, 40-, 50-, 60-, 70-, 80-, and 90-yard passes. Return a 90+-yard kickoff for a touchdown. Return a 90+-yard punt for a touchdown. Return four interceptions for touchdowns in a game. Return four fumbles for touchdowns in a game. Win the Mario Bowl with every team (Even the hidden ones, which means you must unlock them all, so good luck!) with a perfect record (no losses, no ties, all wins). Shut out three teams during the season. Score 70 points in a game during the season. Win by 50 points in a game during the season. Win a game by only kicking field goals and scoring safeties. Win a game 4-2. (exactly!) Win a game 39-18. (exactly!) Beat the computer on hard mode five times straight on Conveyor Conversion. Score a touchdown five times straight against the computer on hard mode on Lateral Lines. In all of these you must do every single thing. You cannot run for 90-yards and say it counts for all 9. It counts for the highest run left on your list and that’s all. The same is true for the 4-2 win; it does not count as your win by only kicking field goals and scoring safeties; you must do that separately. So, once you’ve broken four controllers out of anger and frustration, played the game until your system not only overheats, causes an explosion, and sets your house on fire, but also burns down the house, blows up the TV set, and puts you in jail for arson, and you’ve grown 20 years older; you’ll have unlocked the best team in football history, the Green Bay Packers! Of course, you could always use a Game Shark, but I designed the game to self-destruct upon the use of a Game Shark. ' 'Anyway, this game’s more about Mario and his pals playing football than all of these antics done out of frustration. The game’s a masterpiece; hopefully the American Nintendo guys won’t delete the Koopalings out of it. Oh, and by the way, for those of you wanting to know about the Pokémon teams in this game, here’s a surprise: there aren’t any! Unless the stupid American Nintendo guys put them in too... anyway, here’s my'' deal: Bribe Nintendo into making this game, and I’ll put Pokémon in, if you’re that desperate for them. If you aren’t, then you’re not as dumb as Mario after all. Of course, once my dream game finally does come out, you must buy it, and I’ll review it... ' 'Yoshi: Yoshi upset about Yoshi Yo-Yo’s being worst in league! Yoshi sue! ' ''What’s that there for?' ' 'Roy: It’s in the script! ' ''''I’m tearing up that script right now! Hey, and by the way, that’s Nintendo Football League for you, the best sports game ever, so enjoy! '''